Okay, we all know that it's been alleged that I can't cook. I refuse to believe it and my family plays along because they'd rather not starve (Crash is right now reading over my shoulder and vehemently protesting my lack of skills). Anyway, Husband usually makes fudge for the neighborhood for Christmas but I found this "much easier" recipe in a magazine I accidentally lifted from the Instacare (but that's another blog). It's called Festive Fudge.
I thought Husband (by the way, Crash is also vehemently protesting "Husband's" blog nickname. He would like to change it to The Baldinator). Anyway, I thought HUSBAND was going to take this article and do the fudge. He apparently thought I was taking over the fudge making. Consequently it was a fudge madhouse around here the weekend before Christmas.
Mistake number one is probably stealing the magazine in the first place. Don't do that. Heaven will not be on your side. No matter how many times you tell the angels you are going to take it back they know you will spill lemongrass essential oil on it, your baby will rip the cover and then you will lose it. (I am now being given the 3rd degree by Crash as to how I stole a magazine. One moment.)
He is appeased.
Mistake number two is having me actually cook the fudge. The Baldinator knew better.
Mistake number three is realizing we have to make a million portions when we don't have any desire to go to the store to buy more ingredients. I forged ahead without the extra supplies. That's just how I am.
Mistake number four is apparently pouring cold sweetened condensed milk into warm melted chocolate because it instantly coagulates everything. For those of you who don't know, this makes stirring difficult. Not to mention incorporating the salt and vanilla.
It was at this point that I decided I would have to blog about this misadventure to help me to keep feeling some sense of purpose. After thinking outside the box and reheating the bowl for a bit, I finally got the fudge mixed and into a much larger cake pan than the recipe called for, hoping beyond hope it would all somehow make enough portions for the masses.
Hey, don't sneer. Those are sprinkles on top!! Like on the magazine picture (see above).
Somewhere along the line we decided to cut it into teeny tiny pieces which is how I like my fudge anyway. Voila! Enough pieces!! But we didn't have wax paper. And we didn't have enough plastic wrap and cellophane wasn't cutting it. It wouldn't stay wrapped as you can see below.
At this point we needed help from the kids because we got the idea to roll several pieces up in cellophane at a time, tie off each side of the fudge and then cut them apart.
Once a lot of fudge was tied on both ends and cut apart , Princess and Butterfly curled ribbon and I started making tags with monkey. Since the rolling and cutting and curling process for the fudge took so long, we made the tags as complicated as possible too by stamping, adding embossing powder and letting Monkey work the heat gun.
I thought Husband (by the way, Crash is also vehemently protesting "Husband's" blog nickname. He would like to change it to The Baldinator). Anyway, I thought HUSBAND was going to take this article and do the fudge. He apparently thought I was taking over the fudge making. Consequently it was a fudge madhouse around here the weekend before Christmas.
Mistake number one is probably stealing the magazine in the first place. Don't do that. Heaven will not be on your side. No matter how many times you tell the angels you are going to take it back they know you will spill lemongrass essential oil on it, your baby will rip the cover and then you will lose it. (I am now being given the 3rd degree by Crash as to how I stole a magazine. One moment.)
He is appeased.
Mistake number two is having me actually cook the fudge. The Baldinator knew better.
Mistake number three is realizing we have to make a million portions when we don't have any desire to go to the store to buy more ingredients. I forged ahead without the extra supplies. That's just how I am.
Mistake number four is apparently pouring cold sweetened condensed milk into warm melted chocolate because it instantly coagulates everything. For those of you who don't know, this makes stirring difficult. Not to mention incorporating the salt and vanilla.
It was at this point that I decided I would have to blog about this misadventure to help me to keep feeling some sense of purpose. After thinking outside the box and reheating the bowl for a bit, I finally got the fudge mixed and into a much larger cake pan than the recipe called for, hoping beyond hope it would all somehow make enough portions for the masses.
Somewhere along the line we decided to cut it into teeny tiny pieces which is how I like my fudge anyway. Voila! Enough pieces!! But we didn't have wax paper. And we didn't have enough plastic wrap and cellophane wasn't cutting it. It wouldn't stay wrapped as you can see below.
At this point we needed help from the kids because we got the idea to roll several pieces up in cellophane at a time, tie off each side of the fudge and then cut them apart.
Once a lot of fudge was tied on both ends and cut apart , Princess and Butterfly curled ribbon and I started making tags with monkey. Since the rolling and cutting and curling process for the fudge took so long, we made the tags as complicated as possible too by stamping, adding embossing powder and letting Monkey work the heat gun.
He did a fabulous job. So in the end it turned into A WHOLE LOT OF EFFORT, itty bitty piece of fudge.
I do like how princess stacked everything though. It was almost a shame to deliver it. Pretty sure we won't do it this way next year but, around here, you never know.
I do like how princess stacked everything though. It was almost a shame to deliver it. Pretty sure we won't do it this way next year but, around here, you never know.
Comments
And the fudge was very good, and very festive.
(my unwriterly 2010 resolution is to slyly teach my husband to cook )