Characters
Dad--Nearing 60 years old. Fairly dictatorial. Apparently ordering people around makes one nearly helpless.
Mom (Silver)--Dad's wife. Very nice.
Misty--Their daughter who didn't eat her sandwich.
Jared--Their son-in-law.
Audience--Feverishly taking notes while gawking at the whole scene.
Dad: Did anyone make me a sandwich?
Mom: No, sorry. You can have Misty's, though. She didn't want it.
Dad (inspecting sandwich): Did someone heat this up? The bread's wet.
Mom: I didn't heat the bread. I just heated the turkey and cheese.
Dad: Well the bread's still wet.
Mom: You can take out the turkey and cheese and get new bread for it.
Audience (Thinks to self, how do you heat turkey and cheese for a sandwich without the bread? Wow.)
Dad: Nah. Too much work. (Rummages in fridge) Where are the hot dogs?
No response.
Dad: (Rummaging in fridge) Where are the hot dogs?
No response.
Dad: (Rummaging in fridge) Where are the hot dogs?
Audience: Try the fridge.
No response.
Dad: Ah, here they are. Jared you want a hot dog?
Jared: Sure.
Dad: You want it microwaved or grilled?
Jared: Grilled, of course. We are "camping." I'll even cook them.
Audience (Rolls eyes.)
Jared (Opens luxurious back door to head out to grill.)
Dad: How many hot dogs is Jared going to eat?
Mom: I don't know.
Dad: Hey audience, how many hot dogs is Jared going to eat?
Audience: Uh, don't know. I'm not up on Jared's hot dog consumption needs.
Dad: Is this butter?
No response.
Dad: Hey! Silver! Is this butter?
No response.
Dad: Does anyone know if this is just butter or is it butter butter?
Audience: What's butter butter?
Dad: Well someone brought margarine.
Audience: Sooooo....margarine is butter and butter is butter butter?
No response.
At this point the audience left. It is presumed that Dad got lunch although the audience still wonders why he wanted butter butter for his hot dog.
Dad--Nearing 60 years old. Fairly dictatorial. Apparently ordering people around makes one nearly helpless.
Mom (Silver)--Dad's wife. Very nice.
Misty--Their daughter who didn't eat her sandwich.
Jared--Their son-in-law.
Audience--Feverishly taking notes while gawking at the whole scene.
Dad: Did anyone make me a sandwich?
Mom: No, sorry. You can have Misty's, though. She didn't want it.
Dad (inspecting sandwich): Did someone heat this up? The bread's wet.
Mom: I didn't heat the bread. I just heated the turkey and cheese.
Dad: Well the bread's still wet.
Mom: You can take out the turkey and cheese and get new bread for it.
Audience (Thinks to self, how do you heat turkey and cheese for a sandwich without the bread? Wow.)
Dad: Nah. Too much work. (Rummages in fridge) Where are the hot dogs?
No response.
Dad: (Rummaging in fridge) Where are the hot dogs?
No response.
Dad: (Rummaging in fridge) Where are the hot dogs?
Audience: Try the fridge.
No response.
Dad: Ah, here they are. Jared you want a hot dog?
Jared: Sure.
Dad: You want it microwaved or grilled?
Jared: Grilled, of course. We are "camping." I'll even cook them.
Audience (Rolls eyes.)
Jared (Opens luxurious back door to head out to grill.)
Dad: How many hot dogs is Jared going to eat?
Mom: I don't know.
Dad: Hey audience, how many hot dogs is Jared going to eat?
Audience: Uh, don't know. I'm not up on Jared's hot dog consumption needs.
Dad: Is this butter?
No response.
Dad: Hey! Silver! Is this butter?
No response.
Dad: Does anyone know if this is just butter or is it butter butter?
Audience: What's butter butter?
Dad: Well someone brought margarine.
Audience: Sooooo....margarine is butter and butter is butter butter?
No response.
At this point the audience left. It is presumed that Dad got lunch although the audience still wonders why he wanted butter butter for his hot dog.
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