Day 1
As I shoved an old armchair out my front door today, a guy ran up to give me free air freshener. "I'm not buying anything," I said.
"You don't have to buy anything, we just need your opinion."
"I don't want any," I said.
"Just keep the air freshener, we just want your opinion."
"No seriously, I know you're selling something."
"I promise, I'm not. See those spots on your stairs?" (Ouch, I was just going to rent a carpet cleaner to take care of those). "We'll clean them for free and you just tell us what you thought."
"This is nice air freshener."
He ran back to the van. "David, she's not buying anything, so you just get her opinion, okay?"
I knew it. I KNEW it. They were Kirby vacuum guys--you know, the $2000 vacuum with the 1 and a half hour long sales pitch?
Well, David was fantastic and he really entertained the children. He showed us the filters, the blowers, the 8 foot tall attachment, the pencil width sucker thing. He told the kids one attachment was a scalp massager and did their hair with it. Heck if I know what it really does. Then he turned it inside out. "Now it's a--"
"Butt massager!" My son offered.
I couldn't help it. I laughed until I cried. SERVES THEM RIGHT. And, actually, when turned inside out, that attachment unplugs your pipes, which only made me laugh harder. I thought my face was going to grow another mouth just to let all the laughter out.
Then Michael showed up. The blue-eyed, sideburned face of the operation. "So, do you like the vacuum?"
"I'm not buying one. Where's the guy I said I wasn't buying anything from?"
"I fired him."
Michael went down to $675 on that vacuum. A savings of $1325 mind you.
I DID NOT BUY THE VACUUM.
And my carpet is nice and clean. Aaaaah.
And it IS nice air freshener.
As I shoved an old armchair out my front door today, a guy ran up to give me free air freshener. "I'm not buying anything," I said.
"You don't have to buy anything, we just need your opinion."
"I don't want any," I said.
"Just keep the air freshener, we just want your opinion."
"No seriously, I know you're selling something."
"I promise, I'm not. See those spots on your stairs?" (Ouch, I was just going to rent a carpet cleaner to take care of those). "We'll clean them for free and you just tell us what you thought."
"This is nice air freshener."
He ran back to the van. "David, she's not buying anything, so you just get her opinion, okay?"
I knew it. I KNEW it. They were Kirby vacuum guys--you know, the $2000 vacuum with the 1 and a half hour long sales pitch?
Well, David was fantastic and he really entertained the children. He showed us the filters, the blowers, the 8 foot tall attachment, the pencil width sucker thing. He told the kids one attachment was a scalp massager and did their hair with it. Heck if I know what it really does. Then he turned it inside out. "Now it's a--"
"Butt massager!" My son offered.
I couldn't help it. I laughed until I cried. SERVES THEM RIGHT. And, actually, when turned inside out, that attachment unplugs your pipes, which only made me laugh harder. I thought my face was going to grow another mouth just to let all the laughter out.
Then Michael showed up. The blue-eyed, sideburned face of the operation. "So, do you like the vacuum?"
"I'm not buying one. Where's the guy I said I wasn't buying anything from?"
"I fired him."
Michael went down to $675 on that vacuum. A savings of $1325 mind you.
I DID NOT BUY THE VACUUM.
And my carpet is nice and clean. Aaaaah.
And it IS nice air freshener.
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